Я знав, що колись таке може статися. Мабуть, тому і не був дуже здивований і, тим більше, шокований. Майже не боліло. Це було просто те, що я мав пережити, щоб трохи змінити себе і приглушити старі переживання. Правда я не очікував, що так багато речей зміниться за одну мить. Завжди відбувається таким чином: щось сам довго і нудно намагаєшся змінити в житті, нічого не виходить, а тут за секунду все перевертається з ніг на голову. Значить, так треба. Все, що не робиться - до кращого. Як-не-як, ми всі колись помремо...

Fuck the system or the system will fuck you!

I wanted to write this thought long ago. But usually something stopped me. Controversial ideas stopped me everytime I wanted to share my point of view on this matter.

In various situations we often think about our pities and mistakes and often ask ourselves: "What did I do wrong and why?" I came to conclusion that people miss something. We miss the unnamed thing which allows us to feel surrounding people and conditions properly. You know, what really matters is not people or events but our perception and reaction to it. So, what makes us feel in an optimal way to secure from all the influences of the surrounding world?... Hate... I know it by my own experience. Somebody might say there are some other things to mention but I think this one is the main feature or feeling allowing us to survive. When hating, all our strengthes mobilize giving us the ability to be strong and confident. Only while hating somebody or something we can show the best we can, achiving great results. At those moments we are not sheeps but masters of the situation and our own behaviour. To survive, people must hate. When they don't, they get oppressed by the life, circumstances, troubles, other people who hate. It is so natural. This feeling was granted to us by the nature. Why do we afraid of it and want it to vanish? People can't kill this feeling. How can we kill the part of us? There is no reason to avoid it. Being so useful and spread, hate must be accomodated to our own needs. Whole nations, countries and some people died because they became too liberal, friendly and easy-to-approach. But despite numerous attempts to get rid of it, society will never be able to do it. When hate is pressed too much, it splashes like a volcano and nobody can stop it. All the great leaders and armies achived victory only because they were obsessed with hate and didn't reject it. I think almost everybody agrees that We must be strong. This means we must hate, always.

Today I walked round in my native town. I got tired of all this computer shit, studying, politic idiocy, etc... When I go for a walk somewhere I usually try to make some observations. And this time local people were my object of observing. I tried to analyse the tendency of my town's development in social and cultural ways. Well, yeah, I bought a bottle of beer to clear my mind :)) But that doesn't matter... So, what can I say... From one side I was pleased by what I witnessed. Some things have really changed through last years. And I can assure you that it's true because I lived here almost all my life. Unfortunately, changes are not always supposed to be positive. And that is the thing that upset me. I saw degradated people of different age. I see it in their behaviour, their words, their manners and even in their eyes. Absolute indifference, herd's mentality, ape's behaviour. They try to copy the crowd and persons whom they think are the best. But the problem is that they don't think at all, their thinking is primitive. I don't know why... May be because of the lack of education, information, upbringing, parents' attention... And as a part of a society and the state I became sad about this matter. It can be compared with watching of your friends dying and not only. A special feeling appears. A feeling of loneliness, hopelessness, fatality... slow death. I understand though it is natural, human is an imperfect organism and during its evolution he can progress as well as degradate. The last thing seems to be the one I saw today. I don't know whether it is a long term tendency or not. I hope it isn't. Actually the tendency is the main concept that matters. Will we cure by ourselves or may be we need help from someone? I am sure that strong people who have will power will "survive" and not become scums like many already are. Most people are those who move where the river flows and don't try to swim anywhere else. So, they will become (or even are) the victims of outer conditions which they don't resist. The natural processes will swallow them and spit as garbage. Even today I see a lot of human wastes in the streets. These people seem to be helpless to gegradation... they don't care much... just drink, eat, sleep and do things they want. But who am I to ask them to change something? Why should I care? Sometimes I want to tell: "Die, motherfuckers, you deserve it!" And at that moment I realise that I am a part of them like they are a part of me. I can't do anything about it, unfortunately. We're all tied by the ropes of laws, culture, genetics, etc. And these ropes hurt me, when my people die I feel pain, this pain drags me slowly to a grave also. I just hope those who are conscious, who wish to change it will have more power then the others who strive to become rubbish and go dead in many senses. Help yourself, help me, help us all. Be strong and try everytime you can... The saviours of my town, my country, mankind and thus yourselves... ourselves...

What is more important: to be the one whom everybody likes and accepts or the one whom you want to be despite the wishes of others? I remember the song with the words "To be different means to be always alone". So the question turns into the choice between loneliness and individuality. In most cases we have to sacrifice one of these things. The worse what can be imagined is when you don't achive both. At least that what happened to me. Well, I never tried to make a huge crowd near me but even that little circle of people around me always demanded certain behaviour which I couldn't often give. And I must say that after some time passes you realize that you are tired like hell from this lifestyle, you feel sick and wasted, life seems to be "going nowhere". May be that is the feeling of lack of self realization. Don't you think so? I do. It's similar to clown profession: he needs to make people laugh and happy, that is his aim. And during our life we act like clowns trying to make people around us feel good and like us, we need their appreciation and congratulations, to realize ourself as an important part of the company/society. Heck, just think a little, we strive to recognition, to hear someone say how smart we are and only then we feel good and enjoy the life. Otherwise one feels useless and depressed. That means we all are dependent from others, our life is in the hands of others.

But try to look on it from another point of view and you'll come to the gorgeous idea: we don't need it! We are who we are and there is nothing bad in being ourselves despite what others say. And I mean it, as my own experience tells me... no, even cries to me for last years "Send them'all to hell and do what you think is right". Yes, I will lose most of my previous comrades and many people will turn off from me in the future but, as a fact, it doesn't matter at all. If you friend told you to cut your arm or to turn into the dog for him, would you do it? No, because it is impossible. So why are you trying then? A man should be accepted like he really is and not like he tries to be. Avoid people who don't show their real face, ideals and views, who try to achive your sympathy by all means. Don't be a clown nor try to become a dog. Show mercy to your mentality...

“Long better to reign in Hell, than serve in Heaven.” John Milton.

Taken from here - http://www.draconian.se/band_anders.html

As you may know, there are many "national heroes" around in Ukraine who strive to beat the pure evil called nazism and fascism. So, the people should know their heroes by face...

Source - http://www.freewebs.com/propovidi

Чи задумувались Ви коли-небудь над тим, як відразу розпізнати борця з Українським фашизмом та расизмом? Ми провели наукове дослідження і визначили кілька характерних прикмет справжнього антифашиста, до яких, зокрема, відносяться: картава вимова, чорна (явно неукраїнська) фізіономія, нетрадиційна сексуальна орієнтація, схильність до проституції. Інколи всі ці прикмети справжнього антифашиста поєднуються в одній особі, а інколи антифашист стає носієм лише однієї з цих ознак.

Отож подивимося на найбільш відомих „українських” борців з расизмом, фашизмом та антисемітизмом.

                                                            Савік Шустер (національність: жид)                                         

 
Валід Арфуш (ліванець)

                                   Сандей Аделаджа (нігерієць)                                  

                                                                     Андре Тан (педераст)

                                                     Євгеній (Соломон) Червоненко (жид)

                                                                          Гепа Кернес(жид)

                                    Давід Жванія – „український” олігарх і не менш „український” політик

The list can go on...

Today I accidentally found a very interesting blog of the man http://shiropaev.livejournal.com/. He wrote many articles concerning politics mainly but most of all I liked his poems.

ОТСТУПНИК

Вадиму Штепе

О ты, восстанья Юлианова

Великолепная тщета!

Вернутся Савлы и Ульяновы,

И пошатнется красота.

В тени дубов умолкнут гимны

И смех танцующих наяд.

Убитый жрец и взятый Зимний

В цепи распада встанут в ряд.

Умрет де факто и де юре

Язык священных родников.

И лишь на миг безумный фюрер

Вернет поверженных богов.

Ликуйте всласть, галилеяне,

Рубите руки у богинь!..

Спокойным взором Юлиана

Простор истории окинь.

Мы возвращаемся из бездны,

Из строк, из камня, из литья,

Чтоб вновь вакхическою песней

Восславить солнце бытия.

Что нам – весна, то этим – скверна,

Позор, гниение и прах.

У нас Отступник значит Верный,

Поправший двойственность и страх.